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  #21  
Old March 16th, 2012, 01:25 PM
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Zpack is slang for 3-day or 5-day courses of Azithromycin.
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  #22  
Old March 16th, 2012, 01:29 PM
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let's face it - with Forrest you'll be waiting in the waiting room while he's posting away on d-90.
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  #23  
Old March 16th, 2012, 01:36 PM
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Originally Posted by rijosho View Post
let's face it - with Forrest you'll be waiting in the waiting room while he's posting away on d-90.
Haha you should see my waiting room now!
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"It is the soldier, who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag that allows the protester to burn the flag"
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  #24  
Old March 16th, 2012, 01:46 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MUDSUX View Post
Chris and John stated it nicely and there are, of course, more to it than can be said in a few paragraphs. But let me lighten the mood and offer some insights to help you with your next office visit. In no particular order

1. Don't ever tell a doc you have a high pain tolerance, it will not impress us and you will lose all credibility because it is obvious to us that you don't, sitting in our office asking for pain rx.
I ran out of macho a long time ago, so I'll meet you halfway.

Please don't ask me to circle a smiley face or a frowny face to tell you how I feel. I will only give my pain level on a scale of 1-10 if you are willing to give some idea of what you think a 1 or a 4 or a 6 feels like. I wouldn't be there if I weren't miserable.

Oh, and please make me young again!
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  #25  
Old March 16th, 2012, 01:53 PM
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I've always wondered what a doctor's favorite procedure is to perform, and which is the least favorite.
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  #26  
Old March 16th, 2012, 02:02 PM
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Originally Posted by Whidbey View Post
Here is my rant : don't post your stuff for sale and then not return your pm's. When you post on other threads, it leads me to believe that you have seen my pm and don't give a shi*. Hail to the high and mighty!
there are a whole host of reasons why they might not have responded to you.

i can't for the life of me figure out why you'd start a new thread to complain about it...deal with it privately or move on to the next.
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  #27  
Old March 16th, 2012, 02:10 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MUDSUX View Post
Chris and John stated it nicely and there are, of course, more to it than can be said in a few paragraphs. But let me lighten the mood and offer some insights to help you with your next office visit. In no particular order

1. Don't ever tell a doc you have a high pain tolerance, it will not impress us and you will lose all credibility because it is obvious to us that you don't, sitting in our office asking for pain rx.
2. If you want pain meds don't pretend you don't know how to say Vicodin or Dilaudid. It's embarrasing. It's not that hard to pronounce and we would respect you more if you look us in the eye and just ask.
3. Don't tell us you need a Zpak to "knock it out" because all we want to do is knock you out.
4. Women, if you're going to use tampons please remember how many you put in there.
5. Don't tell the us your cold is "draining" into your chest. Unless you have loss your gag reflux, it does not drain into your chest. You either cough it up or swallow it. Think about it.
6. If you've had this problem for 3 years, we cannot fix in one office visit. It's not TV, we don't perform miracles.
7. If you suddenly have an abscess on your ass, it's probably from you picking at it. Please don't tell us a spider bit you because we seriously doubt a spider can bite you in the ass and you not know about it.
8. If the nurse knock on the door while I am examining you, it's because I told her to, so I don't have to listen to all your complaints. If this happens more than 2 times, you have become the bane of our existence, known as a "frequent flyer", do us both a favor and find another doc.
9. If you can have an erection while watching porn or wake up with one, don't ask us for Viagra because you can't get it up for your wife. It's not an organic problem, it's a mental block.
10. If you are complaining of a sinus infection, please know where your sinuses are.
11. Understand that the medical problem is yours, own it. We are here to help and guide you but you have to be accountable for your own health. We can lead the horse to water but we cannot make the horse drink it.
That was truly awesome! thank you for that.
Especially the part wehere a FL doc acknowleges the ridiculousness of the pain clinic system. Isn't Florida the highest per-capita opiate dispenser? Oh wait, there's actually no state registry and no way to track how many rx are written in FL or has this changed at all?
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  #28  
Old March 16th, 2012, 02:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jackie Treehorn View Post
That was truly awesome! thank you for that.
Especially the part wehere a FL doc acknowleges the ridiculousness of the pain clinic system. Isn't Florida the highest per-capita opiate dispenser? Oh wait, there's actually no state registry and no way to track how many rx are written in FL or has this changed at all?
New requirement: http://www.eforcse.com/
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  #29  
Old March 16th, 2012, 02:50 PM
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That was great Forrest.
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  #30  
Old March 16th, 2012, 03:31 PM
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Originally Posted by airbornrover View Post
Ill ask what is a "Zpak"?
A Croation developed 3 to 5-day antibiotic (vs the common 14 to 21-day) that is available at any street corner pharmacy in the developed world without a prior prescription. In the States, it is necessary to call your doc, endure the "if this is a life threatening emergency, hang up and dial 911, else...), make the doc appointment, for many -- take time off work, go to the doc's office, fill out the same insurance forms already on file for you, wait 15 minutes (2 to 3 hours!?! - wow!), have a five minute examination by the doc, drive to the Pharmacy, drop off the prescription (a good doc office will call it in for you -- if they don't find another office), wait the 30 minutes for the prescription to get filled, and finally pop the double dose for day one all the while your bacterial infection has progressed another few days because of these addtional steps required in the States. Have a sinus infection in Italy, St. Maartan, wherever, this would be reduced to a 15 minute walk-in.

Sorry, ranting.
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  #31  
Old March 16th, 2012, 04:21 PM
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Second on the pain tolerance comment. That is a red flag that you have zero pain tolerance. True pain tolerance is the old dude I was cutting some skin cancer out under local anesthesia and he tells me half way through he can feel the cutting and cautery bc that area wasnt numb. He never flinched, never had a change in his voice etc. oh yeah ex recon marine pow for a few years in Vietnam: that's pain tolerance. Telling me you have 10/10 pain with a normal heart rate and talking on the phone is the complete opposite of pain tolerance. 10/10 pain is hot poker to the asshole while being raped in the pee hole with something barbed
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  #32  
Old March 16th, 2012, 04:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by El Solis View Post
10/10 pain is hot poker to the asshole while being raped in the pee hole with something barbed
I figured I was the only one Barry had told that story to.
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  #33  
Old March 16th, 2012, 04:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by El Solis View Post
10/10 pain is hot poker to the asshole while being raped in the pee hole with something barbed
Sounds like passing a kidney stone with a raging hemorrhoid (not that I've experienced either). Where does getting a cavity drilled and filled without Novocain register on the 1-10 scale?
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  #34  
Old March 16th, 2012, 06:02 PM
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Well I apologise for dragging this post entirely off track. I must admit that my best medical experience was on Borg-saint-Maurice France. We were taking a road trip in the summer and somehow I got a throat infection. We found the doctor first thing in the morning walked right in and my wife said in French "do you speak english?" and his response in english was "do you speak French?". He checked me in 10 minutes wrote three prescriptions. Pharmacy was a short walk away and the entire process was a half hour and cost us 30 euro including the prescriptions. Its never been that easy here in the states. I did miss out on a lot of good wine being on antibiotics though. Thanks France for picking up the rest of the tab.
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